Ding....

Ding
Hello
Ding...
Goodbye
Ding
Hello Again...
Ding...
I don't think this is going to work

Ding!
This is getting old
Ding!
Why do you continue knocking!?
Ding
Am I not a lost cause??
Ding...
I am broken
Ding..
I am damaged goods...
Ding
You must have better places to be
Ding
Less tarnished souls to Save.
Ding!!
Ding!
Ding...

Ding...
Hello
Ding
I hear You
Ding
I see you now
Ding
Like I never did before

Ding...
I place my hands, my life in Yours
Ding...
Never let me go
Ding
I was a fool
Ding
You weren't the one saying goodbye
Ding...
It was me

Ding...
I'm here now
With you
Ding...
I want to be ready
For what Your Will has for me
Ding...
I want to forget the past
Leave it rot behind me
Ding...
You are the Mystery
What I can not fathom
Ding...
Ding...
Ding...

Here.
I.
Am.

I want to die to myself...
I want nothing to remain...
Except you.
Kill my pride
Kill my selfishness.
Take it away...
I only want You.

Ding...
The Dawn is Treading...
Rising over the mountain
Ding...
You are my Hope
Ding...
You are my King...
Ding...
You are my God...
There is nothing...
I AM NOTHING...
Without You

We're All Apart in God's Song

 
Before I let you go, give me just one more night to let you know just how I feel.
Before you say goodbye, can I look upon your face one last time
I tried to let you go, I wish I could turn back time and show you how I feel
I tried to be yours, somebody I could not be -- A fallacy -- A shadow in the night


Before you let me go, whenever that day came
You saw me, for more than I saw myself
Potential that had yet to be grasped
Know, though, that I can never let you go
I see you, now, for more than I had ever before
As if my eyes were never fully open


There is a spot light, it was with you
But it needed to move toward the next place on the stage
Before the bulb flickered
And would never shine there, fully, again


If we slip away in darkness do we fall from memory?
Why must the little things in the journey of life haunt our soul?
Do angels sit at the crossroads of our life
With neon signs pointing us toward the light?


There are choices we must look upon
And realize who we truly are
Turning right and left matters little
In the Odyssey of life
Right...Left...God will be use us
As His Will dictates
We all have our own part in God's Song

I made a soldier's decision to fly away
As much as it pained me to do
I turned left
You stayed on the road and took the next right...

I raise my glass to you
And the incredible life
That God has granted you, my family
Here's to you, my friends, my brothers, my sisters!
Heaven's not far away
Cheers
I Love You

To my Family that God called me away from in both Grass Valley, CA and Catonsville, Columbia, Ellicott City, Baltimore, Elkridge, etc, Maryland.  The words that I write will never compare to my actual Love and Affection toward EACH and EVERY one of you.  I love you.

*I know I posted "God's Song" by Cold as the song that inspired this post, but really Cold's entire Album "A Different Kind of Pain" was a huge inspiration to me in this piece, taking whole lines, or part of lines, of lyrics...

Adulthood -- Inspired by "What I've Done" by Linkin Park

There comes the days when one has to take that pivotal step from Child to Adolescent, Adolescent to Young Adult, and Young Adult to Adult.  I've been playing a fictional character for the past few years named "David S. Floyd - Adult" When my title really was closer to "Adult in Training" due to the fact that I had Blinders on most of the time.  My perception, six days out of seven, of what an Adult was, was defined by, more or less, myself rather than what it actually is.  So, allow me to start this post in defining what the world defines it as and go from there...

Dictionary.Com:  Noun: 1) A person who is fully grown or developed or of age. 2) A full-grown animal or plant. 3) A person who has attained the age of maturity as specified by law. 

Adjective: 4) Having attained full size and strength; grown up; mature: an adult person, animal, or plant. 5) Of, pertaining to, or befitting adults.6) Intended for adults; not suitable for children:

Or...Just for fun, if you'd rather...Urban Dictionary Defines "Adult as" (NOTE! Going to Urban Dictionary is at one's own guidance!!)

1) The period of your life before death, and after the time when you realize that it is, in fact, NOT cool to paste cut-outs from 'Teen People' onto your binder. (When Jenny realized that she had become an adult, a part of her died)

 

2)  A depressed child. Adults have the notion that juveniles need to suffer. Only when they have suffered enough to wipe out most of their joyous spirits and innocence are they staid enough to be considered 'Adult'. See also: Mature.(You go to your kiddie freinds. Come back when you're an adult and stop playing Pokemon)

In my opinion, the fact that I can go out and buy a Lottery Ticket, buy and drink alcohol, and I get cheaper car insurance does not...should not be what we judge "Adulthood" by.  Unfortunately....While I was not walking with Him as closely as I needed to, I fell into the world's trap of the definition.  I have paid my taxes and bills on time.  I signed up for a credit card, last week, and, because of my good credit, I and was approved for a larger amount of credit than I know I will need...But what does that do?  What kind of effect do they have on my life?  Simple Answer?? NONE

But our Spiritual Adulthood should be closer to who we have become because Christ is living IN us!  That our light will shine in the world and that we take our crosses up daily in the journey to follow and become like Him!  I went to a gathering this past week and one of my coworkers' wives asked me how I had been where I replied "I've never been better...I can't complain" She replied with, "I want whatever you have" Where without fail I responded with, "Come to church and find out..."  

What I've done, in my past, and what I will do, in my future, is and will be nothing that I am proud of.  I am a wretch.  I am a schmuck.  I am a hypocrite.  Yet...I have been saved by God's Grace that He gives freely; not because I...we have earned it by our own merits but because He gives it to us freely. I do stupid things that I don't know why I do them...TIME AND TIME AGAIN!  I know that I will stumble and I will fall, but that will not deter me in my quest of becoming closer to him because I know that God came down to rescue me, to be my Savior, and, like always, he will continue to pull me out of my personal Pit of Despair.

I know that the path that I am on is the road less traveled.  I know that it will be a struggle to move my feet at times, but I just need to TRUST in Him and my life will be nothing short of amazing THROUGH Him!  I've lived life without Him and I've lived life in Him....I still will stumble, but there is no more doubt in which path I want to be on....

"For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this i s not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast" Ephesians 2:8-9

The Past is Dead

Do you ever look into the past and realize why it truly is the past, and that it should just stay there?  I don't dive into old journals too often, except my old poetry that I see if I can improve, but when I do I thank God that he pulled me out in one piece.  I thank Him that no lives were ruined for they have truly made me into the man I am today because of those trials and tribulations that I failed in then.

I look back to remember the boy I was, so that I can see the hills that He has helped me climb to where I am.  Looking at where I am now, however, is still not close to who I know I can become.  My journey is not over.  My feet might slip from time to time.  I may stumble and fall. But there is one who is there in my corner...Urging me...Encouraging me...STRAIGHT UP PUSHING ME forward.

I look back, from time to time, not because I want to relive those times.  I look back because I want to remember where I was, so I can appreciate where I am now.

I leave this with a song that has nothing to do with this post, but I love the video.  It's pure and elegant with it being shot in Black and White, and it just simplistically fits.  

The past, who we were, is now dead to us; we are never alone.

Just Because....

I lack time to really blog about anything deep, so I'm just throwing this link on here because this is what I'm playing.

Failure to Excel is a local band to the Baltimore, MD area.  The bassist is one of my close friend's ex-boyfriends, so I listened to them every-now-and-then.  The quality might not be the best, but this is one of the best covers of this song that I've heard through YouTube.  Also, being that it is an idie band, not enough attention gets shed their way. 

So listen.  I hope you enjoy.  And I promise that the next blog will be more meaningful...

Jesus is for Losers

No I didn't sta..sta...stutter with the title choice.  As you listen to or read the lyrics ( which can be found HERE )  try to understand what Mr. Taylor is trying to get across to the listener.  

Starting off with a hammer he starts chisiling down getting into the "meat and potatoes" of the song within the first 3 lines "If I was driven/Driven ahead by some noble ideal/who took the wheel?"  Our thoughts, our actions, although they can be noble, but do they drive us?  Where do they lead?  Are we aiming for something higher that we are chasing after?

"Just as I am/I am stiff-necked and proud/Jesus is for losers/Why do I still play to the crowd?  Just as I am/ Pass the compass, please/Jesus is for losers/I'm off about a hundred degrees"

I don't know about you all, but in the times of my past the more I've thought I've "had my life together" (1) the more I was totally lost.  The more that I did things my way, the more the tapestry of my life unraveled.  The more I turned my back from God, the more he pursued me.  And why?  Why was it so difficult?  Why did I have this struggle to accept this Ever-Lasting-Love that was freely given?  Stiff-necked and proud with my nose up into the air, I didn't want to give it over.  I did not want to get out of the driver's seat (as it were, not like I was REALLY the one driving, but you get my metaphor).  Bowing my head in surrender...Trusting in Him I didn't want to do.

Jesus said, "And whoever does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it." - Matthew 10:38 & 39

"Just as we are/At a total loss/Jesus is for losers/Broken at the foot of the cross/...Just as I am/In a desert crawl/Lord, I'm so thirsty/Take me to the waterfall"

I woke up on New Years Day, this year, and realized how thirsty I had become.  How lost, how blind I was living.  Following the crowd, living life not in TOTAL and COMPLETE darkness.  I still prayed.  I still listened to Christian music, and I knew the church I wanted to become involved in and call "Home"...eventually.  I was definitely not living it up to the standards that I set for myself.  New Years Morning, waking up on a couch in a strange house and with a head ache and all, was my turning point.  I am not, and never will be, perfect, but there is something more in me, now, that wasn't as evident before.  "Jesus is for losers/Grace from the blood of a tree"

(1) - Quotation taken from Mr. Russ Bloom

Welcome to My Music Blog!

This is the start of something new.  I don't know where it will lead.  I don't know if it will be something great.  Or just end up as an #EpicFail. But, anyways, Wecome! No, that doesn't seem right...Here, how about...This....  

WELCOME TO MY MUSIC BLOG!!

There, that about sums it up nicely.  Here I will discuss music, but not in the normal way.  I am not a critic. I enjoy discussing music in it's entirety.  I was raised with a Mother who listened to Neil Diamond and two older siblings that listened to everything in the 80s from Journey to Guns N' Roses to Ace of Base...And then later in life I have come to enjoy Post Rock to Trance and Dub Steep.  If you disagree, or have other aspects that I haven't seen, feel free.  This is an open forum that I felt like I needed to start to help me write something other than poetry.

I will be adding a lot from YouTube so I apologize in advance if some of the video's musical quality is a little bit lacking.