Poetry & Beethoven

This is my 1st Draft...

"Write the First Draft with your heart, write the second with your head" -- William Forrester - "Finding Forrester"

 I'll get to the 2cd draft later...

Poetry & Beethoven

Poetry:  To the few, they mean something.  To the more fortunate, they can breathe what they read and come out a changed person.  They can feel the Words that are much more than “words.”  Poetry can become much more than just poetry.  To some, poetry is Beethoven: Beautiful and Majestic – in just a different form of Art.  Where readers can read poetry and can either get what the poet is saying, or not, they will apply it in a way that is unique to them.  With Beethoven, a “Poet of Music,” ten people can listen to any of his pieces and can come up with ten different theories of what he, the poet – the artist – was feeling at the time.   Poetry, to me, is like Beethoven, Bach, Chopin, or modern day Post Rock, the common person can listen to it all day and be in their happy place.

 Others, however, view Poetry like Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch or Paula Abdul: TOTALLY and UTTERLY a waste of time, now, or maybe a "Once in a Blue Moon" type of listen – they may have been the Kings and the Queens of the 80’s, they are forgotten now.  Maybe the average person will check out a friend's blog where he/she has written something that they have sweated blood and cried over...Smile...Maybe say something nice…And move on throughout their day unaffected.  "Poetry is a thing of the past" some may say."  Shell Silverstein and Edgar Allan Poe were good at the moment, reading and studying in Grade and High School, but this is real life, who has time for Poetry..." They choose to only read words, while they forego the time to breathe them in. Of course, not all Poetry can be like Beethoven, while Beethoven is “Classic” some poetry will suck!  There is only one Beethoven like there will be only Edgar Allan Poe.

In this Digital Age, it seems that less people have time for sitting down and reading a book, or not enough imagination, inspiration to listen to a ten-minute orchestra piece and try and decipher what it means because it doesn’t have “lyrics” – Heaven forbid! The world today can make all the time in the world to stay relevant on the latest movies and have all the latest applications on their iPhones and Droids.  Our TVs are set to digitally-record all of our favorite shows that we might miss while we annihilate complete strangers on Call of Duty on Playstation or XBOX 360.  And let us not forget that our Facebook and Twitter statuses are up to date to tell all our "friends" what a great life we live without them, yet in actuality we aren't doing much more than Youtube-ing random videos that make us laugh, or smile toward strangers as we wish that we had their lives.  We envy that we are not out with ACTUAL friends having fun.  We stare mindlessly at our Televisions and Computer screens pretending to be social with our curtains closed, while our lives pass us by.  

  Smoke…The world has become smoke – Vanity, it’s all vanity.

2012 Goals

I've stopped dreaming of the fallacy of coming up with this unrealistic goal of conquering of "New Years Resolutions," because what is the goal of every Christian?  To become like Christ.  To reach perfection.  To stop sinning against God, and love Him more. Or something to that effect, give or take a few words.

As I reviewed my GOALS of 2011, and looking at myself in the mirror I realized that I did SO MUCH BETTER than any other year previously; I still EPICALLY failed, however, getting no where near where I wanted to be.  So, here is where I am...A year older, but not much wiser.

1) I NEED to Dive into God's Word!!  I don't care, so much, about memorizing verses WORD FOR WORD if it is going to detract from me KNOWING what the versus say.  I can memorize the whole Bible, but if I don't know what it says than that kinda defeats the purpose doesn't it?  An hour per day I'd like to devout to God in his Word, or Study material...

2) I want to know more about my personal morals and ethics, and how they relate against scripture.  I realize that there are OODLES (how's that for a word drop!?) of scripture that the Bible will say one thing, but my mind will interpret it so much differently.  Not because I want to mold scripture into what I want.  Sure, there will be a few versus that I will clash with, who doesn't?  As I carry on conversations with my friends and coworkers, however, I want to have a leg to stand on as I discuss WHY I believe this or that.

3) I want to make my next rank in the Air Force!! I am going to be 27 in 3 months, and I get withheld information at work because of my rank.  I get looked at and treated differently, like I'm 19 years old again, and I'm not a fan of it!!  And, besides, "Staff Sergeant Floyd" sounds SOOOOO much sweeter than "Senior Airmen Floyd."  1 Hour per day will be devoted to study for my test in May!

4) Personal and Material things I need to give up.  I need to give up spending money on needless materialistic things.  I want to buy a house SOMEDAY...Move out of my HORRIBLE living situation sometime by the beginning of 2013 (Lord Willing I'm Still Here in Lancaster) (<----NOT! That I shouldn't be...I'm just thinking realistically...I just don't know) and eating out for lunch everyday...And buying things that don't need to be bought just isn't what I need...

5) Lose weight.  I want my goal to be 170 and reassess when I get there.  I'm thinking I need to lose at least 25 or 30, for now.

2011 :: A Year in Review

Is it really the end of a year?  Do I REALLY have to look at myself in the mirror?

Two-Thousand-Ten was a learning year for me.  I left my first Non-Blood Family in Maryland with being Called back home to California.  I arrived in Lancaster in the middle part of July and found the church (Grace Chapel) I knew God was calling me to in the last weekend of August.  Sometime, though, after the first week of November I got lazy and made excuse after excuse NOT to attend.  And because I was not attending I was not being held accountable to myself, or by anybody else!!

I woke up on New Years Day fighting a hangover on a couch that I'm 100% SURE had been used as a dog's urinal, in a house that smelled like cigarettes, and among people that, though I WANT to believe have good hearts, were not who I inspired to be like in any way, and I thought to myself, "What the Hell am I doing here??  How the Hell did I end up here in this crappy situation??"  The answer was obvious...I put too much personal stock in Skin Deep People.  People who all they lived for was to get to the next weekend so that they could drink themselves silly.  People who are numb and CHOOSE to live in bitterness.  People that have lost their hope.  Men who treat their wives NOT like Treasures, but yell, swear, and degrade them. 

A year ago, I made a list of 5 things I wanted to get accomplished.  Some I accomplished.  Others I made strides towards, and then some I just didn't get anywhere near!!

NUMBER ONE, and MOST importantly, I promised myself that I would step away from that life style.  A year ago, I said that I would get off my butt and get INVOLVED with Grace Chapel (GC)!  That was my #1 Priority!  The going has been slow but stead.  I am truly humbled in the path that God has me on.  Am I perfect yet?  HA!  I think that we can ALL agree that THAT won't happen until I reach the Pearly Gates!  I joined the Choir in February, and that was only the beginning...

2) Trust Him::  In the last part of May, I got invited to go hiking by one of my Choir-Mates, FB Friend (that I had never met in person) to see if I wanted to go hiking to be another adult in escorting the HS.  I accepted....

1) I, honestly, had nothing to do on a Saturday (thus having no good excuse not to go)
2) It was a way to get involved with The Body and meet people.

I had an AWESOME time!  Initially met people that I wouldn't of had a chance otherwise.  Afterward, she asked if I'd be interested to joining the Junior High Staff on Wednesday nights.  And that just freaked me out.  I knew nothing about how to relate to a Junior Higher, and I didn't know if I was the best person to be in a position for kids to be looking up to.  I told her I'd pray about it, and trusting God that this was a direction that he wanted me to take,  I joined the staff in the first week of August....I still have no idea what the heck I am doing sometimes...I am there, however, with an open heart and open mind, for Christ didn't come to this world to be served but TO SERVE...And I'm trying to take as many cues from Him as I can.  Now, 4 months afterward...I'm meeting on Saturdays with the High School Director, diving into how to relate with the youth of today.  It's been a humbling experience.

3) Know Him More & Know More About What Other Religions Believe
Part 1 I feel like I have stepped into a new realm of where I am with my walk with Christ.  I am NOT where I want to be, but in my life's journey I have come a long way in a year.  I have a long way to go, but looking back I see a lot of progress that has been made. :-)
Part 2 of this with what other religions believe I just failed at; HARD!  I want to know, but I just set this away from my mind.

4) Share & Show HIM With Others
I feel like this one I'm finally scratching the surface with.  I just had a long conversation with one of my buddies I was pretty close to in Junior High School and I lost touch with when I switched High Schools.  I hadn't seen him in 10+ Years, and randomly he adds me as a Friend on FB.  I never forget a name of anybody who I've been close with, and when his name popped up I was like..."Heh, Wow...There's a name I haven't heard in a long time..."  He's going through a rough time but I want to believe that God is guiding him towards the Light.  It is my prayer that if he needs somebody he will shoot me an e-mail/text and I will be able to be there for him in anyway that I can be of service to him.

5) Love Others as Christ Loves Me.
I need to work on this too.  I might have done more than what I give myself credit for, but I feel like I can do so much better!! I want to start keeping myself accountable to this!  Every time I think ill-will against a person, I want to feel sick.  When I lose my temper with a person that gets under my skin easily, I want to go to them the next day (or when I cool off) and ask, humbly, for their forgiveness.  I want to be a better man than who I am today.  I want outsiders that don't know me to KNOW that I am a Christian by the way that I love...